Friday, October 20, 2017

"I'm Booooooored"

This CBC article gives "10 Things to Say When Your Kids Say 'I'm Bored". 

They are all wrong.

First of all, they are wrong because they all stupidly and predictably take the onus of boredom away from the brat child and put it on the parent. Sorry, but I am not the Director of Entertainment.

Secondly, the only proper response to I'm bored is courtesy of my late Bubbie, whose standard response to "I'm bored" was always as follows:

"I'm booooooooored."

"Really? You're bored?"

"Yah. I'm boooooooooored."

"Oh. Well, I know what you can do!"


"You want to know what you can do?"


"You can go bang your head against the wall. And wait for the ringing sound!"

My kids learned this very helpful lesson very early in life as I repeated this sage wisdom at every episode of "bored" that attempted to surface in my home.

If I ever got an "I'm booooooored", all I had to do was look at them and say "OH, YOU'RE BORED" and then I would hear the chorus of NO MOMMY NO, NO as I launched cheerfully into the "I know what you can do" section of the script described above.



By the way, I'm never bored.

I don't even know what that means.