Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Pyjamas Are Not Daytime Clothing

I can't stand seeing people wearing PJs during the day.

It looks stupid and frumpy and the people who engage in this ridiculous practice are schlepper losers.

I don't care what your age, size or figure is.

(Note: PJs do not hide obesity-just saying...)

"Thou shalt not wear pyjamas in public" should be one of those things that are SO OBVIOUS that you shouldn't have to actually say them out loud.

But thank you Oxford University (did I really say that???) for this typically understated British Shaming of the Schleppers.

The pyjama shrews must be tamed!

Stop this "slovenly" practice!

(And while you're at it, say slovenly a few times just for fun. Seriously-how many times in any given month do you actually get to use the word slovenly. It sort of slithers of the tongue. S l o v e n l y ! ! ! )

Clothes must be fitted! So there!

"This practice evinces a failure to distinguish between public and private spaces in college", they say.

Well, big fat DUH!

Memo to PJ wearers:

Guess what? I don't want to see you brush or floss your teeth, go to the bathroom, apply your zit cream, buff your toe nails or observe any other parts of your daily hygiene routine, nor your nighttime ablutions.

What part of that is so very difficult to understand?

Please keep your night attire private. Please wear clothing during the day.

Thank you.