Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Too Good (Bad) To Check: The "Good Housekeeping" For ISIS Jihadi Babes

Forget Cosmo, ladies. Forget Good Housekeeping, People-just drop everything and pick up a copy of the latest ISIS Guide To Happy Homemaking. 

The keys to having sweet, terrorist dreams are multi-fold and you, my sweet, body bagged young virginal things, you can make it all happen! It's all in your hands (and perhaps other body parts).

"Their slogan is 'preparing for the honour of jihad' and their online accounts - which post only in Arabic - have attracted thousands of followers so far."

"Among the tips given out are some 'quick and simple' recipes, such as one for 'date balls' that are made by mixing dates, flour and butter together."

"The guide says: 'This is a quick recipe that can be served to the mujahedin [IS militants] with coffee or can be eaten at any time with water, especially during breaks in battles. They contain significant calories and will extend the power and strength of the mujahadeen, Allah willing."


"ISIS strictly forbid women from taking part in combat, and so the propaganda films instead focus on how to assist jihad through 'feminine manual labour'."

(No details of course, but one can imagine just how labourious on the feminine parts it really is...)

"Among the suitable tasks given to women is producing and editing slideshows and film footage, in an effort to make more propaganda, and participating in 'jihadi science' - which is not explained further."