Monday, April 18, 2016

Douglas Murray Wins the Internet Today!

This story just made my day.

I love it. 

Behold: The Inaugural President Erdogan Offensive Poetry Competition. 

With apologies to my OOOPS our Canadian Braveheart Mark Steyn, who I'm pretty sure knows that I think he's a peach (HMMM MAYBE HE DOESN'T I WONDER IF I SHOULD BE A LITTLE MORE, YOU KNOW, DIRECT?!?!?), I must reprise my offer to my favourite alphas: if I weren't already a three "M" (married, mom with mortgage), AND if Douglas Murray wasn't gay, then I would TOTALLY have his babies.

Just sayin!


"Strangely enough, Chancellor Merkel is currently pretending that the trial of a German comedian in Germany for insulting a foreign despot is a liberal act."

"Well I’m a free-born British man, and we don’t live under the blasphemy laws of such despots. So in honour of this fact I have spent the weekend writing rude limericks about Mr Erdogan. And I would hereby like to invite all readers to join me in a grand Erdogan limerick competition. That isn’t to say that entries which come in the form of Iambic pentameters, or heroic couplets will be completely discounted. I think a work in the Homeric mode, for example, about the smallness of Erdogan’s manhood could (if suitably disgusting) stand some chance of winning. But I recommend limericks because almost everything insulting that is worth saying can usually be included within the five lines of that beautiful and delicate form."

Mr. Murray (who really does have one of the biggest set of stones in Europe) says that the rules are that the entries must be as disgusting, profane and sexually explicit and insulting as possible. Entries not fulfilling these criteria will be eliminated. 

"Please submit all entries to, under the heading ‘The President Erdogan Offensive Poetry Competition’. The winning poem will be announced by 23 June. Because we may not be able to announce it after that point."